Wednesday, March 28, 2007

The dilemma

I haven't been thinking of much lately. I mean, being sick and a mommy takes it all out of me...Mentally speaking. There is one thing that I have been pondering though and I thought maybe you all could offer some advice/suggestions.

I am growing my hair out. I hate it really. I love short hair and look better with it. But I have a dream...A beautiful dream...One that I am starting to doubt.

I love and want with my whole heart to have dreads. They are beautiful and I love them.

The Problem:
Dreads look really good on most people that have them. But a majority of those people are just naturally cool or have a certain look/style to them...I have neither of those things going for me. It seems to look fabulous in dreads you have to
A. Be a super cool hippy chick (like TJ)
b. Be funky Portlandy
c. Be Uber outdoorsie (you know what I mean by this)
d. Be 55 and have never brushed your hair as an adult

I am an average 20 something with no particular style. Average clothes, average mom. But I really love dreads. What is a girl to do? Can I still have these beautiful wads of hair and be plain old me? Is that what makes them so great?

So with no answer I continue to grow my average straight hair. Dreaming of the day I can have bad ass dreads. But should this day ever come? That is the question.


RoniZee said...

I know I am going to get yelled at for this, but I vote NO DREADS.

Rizzle said...

And what would you suggest Ronron? That she dye it red and grow it long?

arwen said...

Oh. burn.

My dear.... how do you think that people develop style? They go with it. It takes a certain amount of time as a poseur (the british spelling looks more inviting) to grow into a real true "person". But lets look at the other things that are in your life that support your dreaded future:

1: your husband has long beautiful hair and I'm sure that if he could, he would have a full beard. Like Jesus.

2: you dig on the organic vibe.

3: you wear keens

4: you care about things in your community... remember the library thing?

5: i can't think of a 5.

What I'm saying is this: Look at me, Jess.... do I really have the personality to have short spikey emo girl hair? Ok. Maybe I do, but I would have never known had I not just done it. And seriously, if it looks bad and you hate it, it will only take you like... a month to get back to where you are, you hairy thing......
do it.
do it for me because I don't have the patience.
and most of all, do it for Jones and Sesame. They need a cool mommy. and you know it.

ps: Boo Roni.

tara said...

heres the deal. i love dreads, it is a mutual dream we both have. im pretty sure its why were friends. they would look super cool, buuut, think of how easily you get bored...imagine after a few weeks and all you can do is leave the dreads down or put those giant snakes in a low ponytail held loosely by a scrunchy that can only reach around once?? so then, you say, i will just shave my head! but alas, that will get boring even faster...hmmm, shall i put gel in my buz cut so it looks wet? or should i leave out the gel so it looks dry?

Ashtin Hart said...

My delightful comment was lost in space! Grrrrrrr.
Jess, I have been thinking about the very same thing. Dreads are so wonderful. I love it when they are really thick and long. I think I would be the perfect dreadhead, I mean I have the leg hair to pull the look off. I try to grow pit hair, but Brian thinks it is too French. I have had short platinum ahir, I have had black and red stripes, I have done the blue, I have even had a lesbian mullett (on accident. I think family expects this of me. I am a hippie chick at heart.
Then I learned about how much work goes into looking like a raggamuffin. You have to rat, twist, powder, wax, roll, tuck, tie, etc... What the crap? I thought you didn't brush it and your hair just looked awesome. Who as that kind of time?
So, my dear cousin, if you have the energy and motivation to take on this task, I say do it! Make me proud! Help the family out by being super cool.
p.s. I wish you would call me. I am pretty cool.

RoniZee said...

I am flashing you all an obscene finger.

arwen said...

roni, we are all tapping our fists at you... Friends style.

Ashtin... you of all people, should get dreads. Forget you, Jess. GO FOR IT ASHTIN!

The most appealing thing about the dreads is that it would be socially acceptable to slack on the makeup. For me, that's great. May not be so good for a MaryKay Lady, but... hey.... be a pioneer.

tara said...

good call arwen, mary kay and donna may not appreciate the dreads...tricky.
dear ashtin, im pretty sure that you are the ideal dread person- but not in the "i dont take showers or wear shoes sort of way".

Ashtin Hart said...

Um, I feel like I stole the dread thunder. I was just trying to support your desire for hippie hair.

Melissa S. said...

I think you should go for it Jess!! I've always thought that you can pull any hair style off and look great!! If you don't try it now you'll always wish you had. Remember when you are pregnent you can wear anything!! Like a sheet or drapes!! And look great. Same with you and your hair!! I've never seen a hair cut on you that looked bad. Yes, I know this isn't a cut. BUT go for IT, i say!!! Love ya!!!

arwen said...

way to go Captain Killjoy... (that's you Ashtin)


tara said...

screw mary kay! just do it. i still think youll get bored with it, but it would look awsome in the mean time. you could totaly pull it off.

arwen said...

just wait until after Sesame... wait... shouldn't you be finding out soon!? I'm so calling you tomorrow to find out....

arwen said...

just wait until after Sesame... wait... shouldn't you be finding out soon!? I'm so calling you tomorrow to find out....

tabitha jane said...

if you love them that much, you should do it. they will actually automatically give you the image that you think you currently don't have.
unless they just end up looking white trash. (crap, that sounded rude and snobby) what i mean is, your hair is really really straight and fine (and foine as well) so it will be really hard for you to get your dreads to set as well as to make sure they don't just look like trailor trash. but it is very possible. my best friend has dreads and her hair is very straight, she just had to spend a few hours a day on them at first in order to get them to stay in and set. you will hate them for the first maybe 6 months of their lives . . . and then you will begin to love them and will never want to part with them.
i (not to make myself look awesome or anything) didn't have to try as hard as my friend did because i have naturally curly, nasty, thick, coarse, nappy hair so i really didn't have to work as hard . . . but they still went through stages where i hated them.

dreads are a big commitment. but look at it this way: if you think they will make you happy and you try them and they do make you happy: AWESOME! if you think they will make you happy and you try them and they don't make you happy: you can just cut them all off and have short hair again just like you said you like it and just like you said looks good on you.

personally, i think it is a win win situation.

call me if you need help. i've still got a bunch of dread product from dreadheadhq that i no longer need to use . . . i will save them for you. :)

tabitha jane said...



i feel the need to let you know: dreads are not boring. in fact, they are so fun! i can put mine up in a high pony tail, in a crazy bun, in pigtails (they are HUGE!), leave them down, put them half up, put beads in them, tie ribbons in them, wrap them in a headscarf, dye them different colors (each dread could be a diff color if you wanted), etc . . . wwaaaayyy fun and never boring!

AND cheaper because you only have to buy shampoo like once a year and you never have to buy gel or mousse or use a curling iron or anything.


lots of love,

tabitha jane said...

p.s. number 2:

there is NOTHING sexier than a dreadded pregnant mamma.


end of story.

Jess said...

Yes. I was hoping you would comment Tabitha...being that you are the blogmunities authority on matters such as these. Thanks for all the info. You make a good point about the trailor trash...that is my biggest fear, since I have very fine hair. But I feel I have to take the chance. I was going to wait until Arwen got here to attempt them (the dreads), but I think I should start them soon. Here is why:
a. I don't do much but lay on the couch these could spend a little bit of time tending to them.
b.I don;t go out much, so if I look gross, barely anyone would know.
c. I do want to have dreads while prego and this is my last chance.
d. I am due the begining of Sep...that would give me about 5 months to get them under control.

Sound like good reasons?

Everyone else...

Melissa: I have always wanted a comment from you on my blog. I feel like the luckiest girl ever. I have now reached a new level in my blogging.

Arwen: all good points.

TT: I am glad you believe in dreads. I am not too worried about the MK thing. With two babies I am not really planning on doing much with that anyways.

Roni: I think you got out voted.

Ashtin: I think you should get dreads with me. Really. Think about it...

arwen said...

dangit. I came over here thinking I would comment that I think we are all having a conversation about Jess' head that she's not involved in. Sometimes she sends Ry in her place, but... for the most part, I think she gets some sick pleasure out of getting us to talk about her. And by "sick" I don't mean "psychologic-lee disturbing"... I mean... like..... ill... sick to your stomach.... baby sick. You know... the way she does.

But then I got here, and all she was doing was waiting for Tj to write her a novel.

Ps: You SO told Tara, Teej. Niiiiiiice. Take that African Baby Adopter! BOOYA!

(ps2: i love you tara.....)

tara said...

well, guys i must admit, these eys have been opened. i am not too pridefull to admit that i can now see a whole new world of dreading options! who knew about ribbons, beads, scarves, pigtails??!perhaps, i have merely been surrounded by to many men with dreads...(who apparently do do things like scarves and beads) as long as you dont do the huge low ponytail everyday, i say go for it!!

arwen said...

arwen's vote is in as well. She has re considered. As soon as she gets there, the dreading will begin.

Ty said...

Jess, you are a trend setter, and you shouldn't care if we laugh at your dreds because, pretty soo, everybody will be wanting them . . . judging by some of the comments, they might already want them.

tabitha jane said...

i'll come help. i've got lots of free time. :)

Jess said...

TJ I think I am totallly going to take you up on that offer. Arwen and I were talking and thinking maybe we could make a fun of it. Mabe around the beginning of June?? I want to get them done as soon as possible, but my sister wants me to wait until after I am in her wedding in May.